Truth and Lies

     I am a person who prefers the truth, both saying and hearing, and I do agree that lies can hurt someone -- either a liar or a person being lied. There are many reasons causing ones to lie such as avoiding punishment or embarrassment, getting rewards that they couldn’t get, maintaining privacy, protecting another person from being punished, and getting out of social situation. In some reasons, I was a liar, used to be forced to lie and was tricked by lies.

       I was a liar. When I was a sophomore, my friends, seniors in the same major and I had to prepared a welcoming activity for freshmen - sophomore was the host of the activity. To hold an out-of-campus activity without permission from the school was not allowed but asking for permission is a kind of boring and complicating process. Moreover, it was yearly activity and a kind of tradition for first year student. Therefor, some advisers and teachers in our major agreed with this activity and helped us to do it. They gave us helpful advice because our activity was more like ice-breaking games during the trip. By the way, we still did some little crazy games such as finding some hints in the straw with closed eyes and having another friend telling the direction. Unfortunately, a personnel in the school knew it and he called me on phone directly in the evening before the welcoming activity day. He said if he could find the fault, we all -- both sophomores and seniors -- had to be punished. I was very shocked but what I said to him was I pretended not to know anything - not even participating in preparing meeting of the activity. I was afraid that if I had said something wrong without consulting my friends, it would have made everything worse. I thought he didn’t believe me at all but he couldn’t find any defect from what I had said. ei ei ei Then, he called me again in the next two hours to recheck. I told that he misunderstood the activity and we just prepared local sports among us. I was very surprised myself that how could I managed such a tactful lie. 

freshman welcoming activity

       However, we has to change our program into on campus activity and there was something went wrong in the town that night. we couldn’t use telecommunication and we couldn’t cancel the buses. So we have to pay for the buses’ cost for the whole day. We all was very upset because of the collapsed project and there was another thing  make me more deeply upset. The guy who called me seemed too worried about his working position more than freshmen’s safety.   
       I hided the truth. I used to have class with a crazy teacher. He was hot-tempered and hated to listen to our comments against himself. Moreover, he never prepared for the class. Therefore, we informed such terrible things to the his supervisor. When he knew that some of us tattled to him, he was very angry and asked us to comment him directly in class - don’t say his bad thing behind the curtain. My friend, sitting on the first chair, said the truth about his bad habit - and he got more angry. Another classmate, sitting on the next chair, told a lie that he was a good teacher. Then he seemed to be satisfied, but, seriously, I was really hate it. At the time, I was a student, sitting on the third chair,  I could not tell him both the truth and any lies. So, I said in general that, “No one is perfect. To judge any people is none of my business. It belongs to God.” Fortunately, he seemed to be satisfied with it. But I didn’t like it because it caused him no change. On the other hand, it is useless to say the absolutely truth to this kind of person because it caused him no change too.  
        I was tricked by lies. I was tricked by lies. There was two cases that I will never forget them. First case was when I was an exchange student in Malaysia. During the convocation days, some undergraduates including international students in the university prepared performances to show at night. I planned to go back home on weekend but my friends asked me to help her in a performance because she was not good at performing. Therefore, I postponed the leaving day. During the convocation days, students had to walk to class because on-campus buses didn’t work. I had rehearsals with a group of students everyday before the performance night. In the afternoon before the performance night, I was very tired because I was fasting that day. Therefore, on phone, I asked my friend (nickname A), who asking for my help, to pick me up at the dorm because she had a motorbike. She said she had lots of homework to do and apologized to me. Then I called another friend (nickname B), having a motorbike too. B said she was very busy at the time, but A was here with her and she could ask A to pick me up at the dorm. Suddenly, I finished the phone call and asked my roommate to walk with me. My roommate said that if she were me, she would never help her anymore and not perform in the night too. She was very surprised that I was not angry. Of course, I was not angry but I felt very bad. While we were walking to the hall, A came to us with a pale face and gave us the motorbike’s key but we said nothing and kept walking to the hall. Perhaps she was afraid that I would not perform anymore. I still help her because I didn’t want to damage the performance and hurt friends in the performing group, not because of her. The performance that night got a great response form audiences. But my positive feeling to A had been damaged and it was very difficult to repair trust.

My close friend and I

     The second case was happened before I came to the U.S. I had a senior friend (nickname C).  he and I usually went together everywhere, for example, eating, jogging and shopping. Sometimes I asked him to wait me till I finished meeting with my friends and we would have late meal at night. Some of my friends thought that we were in a relationship but I never felt in that way. One day in February, C had to go to Bangkok and had no place to stay. He had some friends working there but he couldn’t contact them. I had a very close friend (nickname D) studying in a province not far form the capital and airport, so I asked my friend to help C to stay at his apartment. C changed when he came back. He said something like feeling neglected by me and asked me to be D’s girlfriend. Four to five days later, he kept silence and didn’t want to talk with me anymore. I had two probably reason for this case. First reason, He felt neglected by me and my friend. Perhaps he used to think that he is the most one close to me but he found the truth when he met my friend. My friend and I were very close. We studied in the same high school and always hanged up with each other in previous day. Many friends think he is my boyfriend but he is absolutely not. (I asked D what happen during the days there but he said it was nothing. He had very busy at the time.) Second reason, he fell in love with my friend. (no more comments for this second reason)  If it was the first reason, he could tell me directly and he could see I had never change; on the other hand, If it was the second reason, he could feel free to love. I had no right to disallow anyone to love someone.  I don’t like the way someone keep silent to me. If something happen and I had done something wrong, I prefer the straightforward way. I was very upset at the time and I called my close friend very often and told him what C did to me (in the wrong ways but I don’t want to mention them here). He asked me not to be worried and forget it. After two months that C was gone, I knew that he had a new and close friend, a handsome guy. I was quite sure it was because of the second reason. C and I talked together again but not in the same way. Too, my positive feeling to C had been damaged. But every cloud has a silver lining. I had learned the hard way not to be too worried about someone who never think of anyone and only see his pain. My friend and I become closer and this situation made me know how great our relationship between me and my close friend is.
     As I had mentioned in my previous blog post, a good person is the one who is sincere. The definition is very simple and important. What I have learned is that the truth may hurt for a short time, but lies forever.   

 

     As I had mentioned in my previous blog post, a good person is the one who is sincere. The definition is very simple and important. Remember that the truth may hurt for a short time, but lies forever.